Stressing

I've been having a hard time juggling the two boys my myself at the same time. Not that I've really had to. But, that's part of the problem. I keep getting Mom and Mel to help. Rowdy has been on nights and I just can't seem to do it on my own. Colby has been giving us problems staying in his bed. Once he is asleep, he stays. But, he comes back down the hall immediately after we put him in. It goes on for at least 1/2 hour. Brady never stays in his bassinet either. So, how do I try to keep Colby in while Brady is screaming? Plus what to do with Brady while I'm bathing Colby? I bathe Brady while Colby is eating. He hates his bath. Of course, I normally have to wake him up to bathe him. I feel like I'm failing as a mother of 2. Colby has gotten really loud lately. Like he has to scream everything he says. Yesterday, he started throwing puzzle pieces. Oh, one positive thing is he says and recognizes all his ABC's. Sometimes he messes up though. Brady's latch has gotten better. So, I lay down in bed while nursing him. I get more rest by sleeping while he nurses. But, sometimes I don't put him back in his bed. I don't want him to wake up crying and wake Colby. Colby has still been waking for the day at 4am sometimes too. Colby still goes to daycare when Rowdy is working. I have no idea how I'd manage them both all day. I'm tired of hearing you'll figure it out too. Brady will not stay in his swing or bouncy seat. So, that doesn't help. He falls asleep nursing. But, I put him down and he is up crying. I am so afraid that he will be a bad sleeper like Colby was. Colby waking him up doesn't help. I didn't want to start the habit of Brady sleeping with me. But, I need sleep. Oh, the other night Colby was up from 1:30-3:45 AM!